My father (62) had already one tumor removed from his bladder and another one is still on his kidney. Suddenly, he started to talk about not accepting any other surgery or any other type of cancer treatment. Obviously, he thinks there is a chance it just disappears...
Family - 20 Answers
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1 :
tell him how much you love him
2 :
Reassure him that his family needs him and loves him. If you can convince him that you guys will miss him dearly if he gives up, then MAYBE he'll accept the treatment. If you want to find a way to force him to do it, you could say he's temproarily insane and have the treatment administered to him without his consent. But that's the extreme.
3 :
Get a survivor to talk to him!
4 :
He's in denial. Get him to see a doctor again to get a medical opinion.
5 :
You cant make him sweety... You can only tell him you support him in his decisions and hope the facts have been explained to him about his disease...
6 :
you cant make him take the treatment if he doesnt want it maybe he has excepted his death just talk it over with him ask him why he doesnt want the treatment but dont try and force him into it at the end of the day its his choice
7 :
put urself in his place this is not abt u and wat u want its abt ur father bein terminally ill....my dad had cancer and sadly passed away as there was no more the hospital cud do for him but i know even if there was he wud have said no. its the most heartbreaking thing i know but try to understand and tell him how u feel
8 :
Tact as i always say, bring him to listen to u wit love and care, remind him of childhood days, n mistakes u made which made ur parents cross, when u wont listen to them...n say tht now u r like a parent to him, n ask him to listen to u....say this very lovingly, say do it for the sake of ur child if not for urself dad.
9 :
First of all pray, secondly you have to support his decisions. I know it is hard to hear, but he may be ready to go. You might want to have clergy talk to him as well.
10 :
To begin with how much do you love your father. Tell him that the treatment is for his own good. Dont let your father assume anything like this. This is serious, tell him how much you love him and that youd prefer he accept the treatment because in the long run it will help him. My grandfather died of cancer awhile back, and you know why. Its because by the time they caught it, it was already too late for him. Dont let this situation happen to your father. Tell him that treatment can help prolong his life and maybe even help him in case it doesnt disappear. Good luck I will pray for you both
11 :
well i know how hard it must be on you my mother passed away three years ago from lung cancer. you can't make your father do something he doesn't want even if you want it for him. Ultimetly it is his decision and his alone you will just have to accept whatever his decision is
12 :
its hard to accept someone with cancer cause they are scared of the treatment cause its nothing but poisin to the system and he does not want to feel the effects of it
13 :
Tell your father how much u love him,and let him know that u don't want him to die.
14 :
My father got cancer, too. His started in the throat, then got into his lymph system and eventually spread to his lungs, where it killed him. He had a tracheotomy and a laryngectomy immediately, then started chemo and radiation. He never finished the treatments, as they were making him as sick or sicker than the cancer. He made his own choice for quality of life. He got to feeling better and started getting involved in his life again, which worked for nearly three years until the lung cancer manifested rather suddenly. He spent the last 5 months of his life bedridden. It was sad to see, and I still miss him terribly, but ultimately it was HIS decision. Your father probably doesn't think it will just disappear. Perhaps he's just tired of all the medical stuff - doctors visits, medicines, being poked and prodded, etc. Likely, he's making his peace with the disease and his eventual passing (whenever that might be, soon or late). The best thing you can do for him is support whatever decision he makes.
15 :
iTS GOING TO BE HARD TO CONVINCE HIM TO HAVE IT DONE AGAIN IF HE HAD HAD ANY COMPLICATIONS WITH THE FIRST OR MAYBE HE JUST HATES THE PROCEDURE. i FEEL YOUR PAIN MY HUSBAND HAS LIVER CANCER AND IT IS A HOPE AND PRAY TO GET HIM TO GO. HE HATES THE WAY CHEMO MAKES HIM FEEL SO HE BACKS OUT ON TREATMENTS. i HAVE TO REMIND HIM ABOUT FAMILY AND FRIENDS WHO LOVE HIM AND WANT TO SPEND TIME WITH HIM. AND ALSO HE HAS LOTS OF TIME LEFT ON THIS EARTH AND I WANT TO BE THERE WITH HIM FOR YEARS TO COME......TALK WITH HIM TELL HIM HOW MUCH YOU CARE AND PRAY TO THE LORD .
16 :
it's never easy speaking to your parent about something like this. my mother has luekemia and there are days when she feels like giving up, but i try to be there for her and push her to keep getting treatments. don't feel bad asking them to do it for you and the family. they will understand, and that means more life to share with them. good luck, ok.
17 :
(1) Yes it is absolutely correct.Though scientific world has not yet revealed, there is an unrevealed reality. (2) Meditation, being a vegetarian, always living with pleasure, adjusting the mind to live away from the materials society are some helpful tips.
18 :
You have to do a little research before trying to convince you dad to get treatment. For example, it is quite likely that your dad has talked to the doctors and has more information than you at this point. Cancer that has spread has no chance of cure. Chemotherapy can make a person very sick. If he lives alone, there would not be anyone to take care of him if he gets chemo and feels like throwing up all the time. So talk to him to get more information before trying to change his mind.
19 :
Well ultimately you can't MAKE him do it. you can however, tell him how much you love him and how it will hurt you for him not to have the surgery. If the talking to him about it doesn't work, you can accept his decision, and be there for him. Sorry he's not wanting another surgery, and I know it's hard on you, but think, he's going through a lot too. He might just not want to hurt anymore, or go through the treatments. Hopefully things will work out, and don't forget to PRAY!!!!
20 :
I doubt that's what he's thinking. See how much his doctor will tell you. If it's absolutely terminal, you have to think about how you would want to live your own last days. If it's not but he has been in horrible pain for a long time, he might just want it to be over. Just tell him how much you love him and direct the conversation to happier days as much as possible. Best wishes to you all.
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